- Do you desire to get married?
- Do you feel the pressures of other married Christians that you are at the age of finding your mate?
- Have you asked God if you should be married or if singleness is better for you?
- How do you feel about the statement that Singleness provides a unique opportunity to invest deeply in our relationship with God. 2 Timothy 4:13
We’re at our best when we function as we were designed. Freedom isn’t the absence of boundaries. It’s the ability to fulfill our created intent. Because of the freedom single people experience, they have more time to focus. However, most people use this season to focus on one of two interests:
- CAREER. They’re working to get ahead or climb the ladder.
- THEMSELVES. They say things like “I’m taking this time to focus on me.”
Neither of these pursuits is wrong, and yet neither focus will ultimately satisfy our hearts. We have to get our relationship with God right before we can ever hope to get a relationship with a guy or girl.
In Greek, the word devotion is made up of two words: good and beside, meaning we need to become good at being beside God, attentive to His Word, and involved in His work.
Paul gives us an example of how to live a life of biblical singleness. We can evaluate our lives to learn how to implement some of his practices.
Things to work on while single / dating
(let them give examples/comment)
- Build/ deepen your relationship with God-how?
- Live a full life – travel/singles bucket list
- Pursue your purpose – Godly interest
- Desire marriage, but don’t worship it – Is this constantly on your mind?
- Learn to steward your household – learn how to budget, live frugally and spend on things that matter.
- Become the best version of yourself
- Spend time with other Christian Singles
- Practice self-care
Example: Self-Love Saturday (once a month):
- I read God’s word in the morning
- Go for a walk or run
- Treat myself to a lunch
- Get a manicure or pedicure
- Take myself shopping
- Take myself to the movies
It really depends on my need and my wallet. And I do all this to acknowledge the beautiful life I have because of God’s grace.
- Get involved in ministry, local community/ missions
- Invest in yourself
Discussion question: Marriage isn’t better or worse than singleness — it’s just different.
My friend Jen got married in her early 30s. We’d been friends for a long time, long enough for her to be honest about the realities of married life. Jen was content being single but realized after she married that she still expected marriage to make her happy deep down inside. She confided in me that it didn’t. Married life had wonderful blessings and unique challenges, but it wasn’t any better than being single — just different. She had traded in one set of blessings and challenges for another.
The extent to which we can be content being single depends on what we believe about marriage. Do we think we’re missing out?