Men 3 ways to ruin your marriage
Isaiah 31:1 (Amplified Bible)
31:1 WOE TO those who go down to Egypt for help, who rely on horses and trust in chariots because they are many and in horsemen because they are very strong, but they look not to the Holy One of Israel, nor seek and consult the Lord!
1 John 2:15 (Amplified Bible)
2:15 Do not love or cherish the world or the things that are in the world. If anyone loves the world, love for the Father is not in him.
James 4:4 (Amplified Bible)
4:4 You [are like] unfaithful wives [having illicit love affairs with the world and breaking your marriage vow to God]! Do you not know that being the world’s friend is being God’s enemy? So whoever chooses to be a friend of the world takes his stand as an enemy of God.
Romans 12:2 (Amplified Bible)
12:2 Do not be conformed to this world (this age), [fashioned after and adapted to its external, superficial customs], but be transformed (changed) by the [entire] renewal of your mind [by its new ideals and its new attitude], so that you may prove [for yourselves] what is the good and acceptable and perfect will of God, even the thing which is good and acceptable and perfect [in His sight for you].
Genesis 15:1 (Amplified Bible)
15:1 AFTER THESE things, the word of the Lord came to Abram in a vision, saying, Fear not, Abram, I am your Shield, your abundant compensation, and your reward shall be exceedingly great.
1 Peter 3:14 (Amplified Bible)
3:14 But even in case you should suffer for the sake of righteousness, [you are] blessed (happy, to be envied). Do not dread or be afraid of their threats, nor be disturbed [by their opposition].
Colossians 3:9 (Amplified Bible)
3:9 Do not lie to one another, for you have stripped off the old (unregenerate) self with its evil practices,
- Winston Churchill’s immortal words: “We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills.”.
- Family members have responsibilities.
- An exhaustive study shows that no woman has ever shot her husband while he was doing the dishes.
- All families face problems.
- we are going to look at a father who stepped over the accepted line.
- He went too far, but God was there to pick him up.
- Last week, we saw that Abram had deepened his relationship with God.
- This week, we see him stumble and fall, in a series of terrible decisions.
Gen 12:10 Now there was a famine in the land. So Abram went down to Egypt to sojourn there, for the famine was severe in the land. 11 When he was about to enter Egypt, he said to Sarai his wife, “I know that you are a woman beautiful in appearance, 12 and when the Egyptians see you, they will say, ‘This is his wife.’ Then they will kill me, but they will let you live. 13 Say you are my sister, that it may go well with me because of you, and that my life may be spared for your sake.”
- Things have never changed, have they.
- “Honey, I’m doing this for your benefit!”
Gen 12:14-20 When Abram entered Egypt, the Egyptians saw that the woman was very beautiful. 15 And when the princes of Pharaoh saw her, they praised her to Pharaoh. And the woman was taken into Pharaoh’s house. 16 And for her sake he dealt well with Abram; and he had sheep, oxen, male donkeys, male servants, female servants, female donkeys, and camels. 17 But the LORD afflicted Pharaoh and his house with great plagues because of Sarai, Abram’s wife. 18 So Pharaoh called Abram and said, “What is this you have done to me? Why did you not tell me that she was your wife? 19 Why did you say, ‘She is my sister,’ so that I took her for my wife? Now then, here is your wife; take her, and go.” 20 And Pharaoh gave men orders concerning him, and they sent him away with his wife and all that he had.
- Abram’s Failure – Worldliness
Notice the first failure in his life.
- There was the issue of the famine, and Abram left the promise land.
- The failure comes in the form of trust.
- Remember the promise God gave to Abram?
- Gen 12:1-3 Now the LORD said to Abram, “Go from your country and your kindred and your father’s house to the land that I will show you. 2 And I will make of you a great nation, and I will bless you and make your name great, so that you will be a blessing. 3 I will bless those who bless you, and him who dishonors you I will curse, and in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed.”
- Now is it just me, or do you hear in that promise that God would take care of Abram and Sarai?
- If he would have stayed put, God would take care of him.
- Abram was known for his faith, but it fails here.
- When the famine hits, he went to the world system for supply.
- Here is one who heard from God, obeyed, and then God appeared to him.
- Yet when the first famine hits the land, he hits the road.
- This failure in the famine was a failure of faith.
- All sins are essentially failures in faith.
- There was the issue of the facts.
- You can’t call Abram a complete liar, just a partial liar. 🤦🏽♂️
- Sarai was, in fact, his half sister.
- But the relationship that surpassed that happened when he took Sarai as his wife.
- So when the question came up, he lied.
- Remember I said, failures are essentially failures of faith?
- He misled because he didn’t trust God to protect. So this, too, is a failure in faith.
- A half truth is a whole lie.
- I teach discretion. What is the difference in discretion (not revealing all the facts) and a half-truth?
- The purpose is the difference! Discretion wise restraint in speech and the purpose is to protect.
- A half-truth is withholding part of the truth in order to mislead.
- But Abram was protecting.
- Protecting self does not count especially by purposeful misleading so others will believe to a lie.
- Also, the results. Discretion leads people to realize they don’t know the whole story.
- Half truths lead people to believe an error.
- Pharaoh and his servants didn’t think, “I don’t know how Sarai is related to Abram.”
- They thought Abram and Sarai were not married.
- There was the issue of the family lie.
- Abram not only lied, but he asked his family and servants to lie.
- When we sin, we always drag down those we love the most.
- When we become untrusting to God, we usually create great hurt in those we love.
- Consider Sarai. Her husband, the one who was supposed to support for and protect her, shoves her forward in harm’s way to protect himself.
- We are not told how Sarai reacted to this betrayal of the marriage covenant, but if I understand women at all (and I know they are mainly a mystery to me), this hurt her deeply.
- She must have asked herself questions, such as, “Perhaps this is his way of getting rid of me since I have not given him a son.”
- When we hurt someone we love because of our sins, we seldom consider the depth of the pain we created.
- God’s Faithfulness.
- When we read about someone’s failure in faith, facts and family, we expect God to drop the hammer on him.
- But that is not what happened to Abram.
- Abram was right about one thing. When the Egyptians saw Sarai, they went crazy.
- I remind you she was probably 90 years old.
- I think all of us know women who are near 90 years old that we will always consider beautiful.
- But I remind you people of the world do not look for the virtues we appreciate in the silver society.
- I wish they had cameras in those days, but my curiosity about Sarai’s looks has always been there.
- When I was young, our term for her description was that she is BAD.
- When word got to Pharaoh, he had to get a look at this beautiful woman.
- He had his servants bring her to the palace.
- He approved of her looks and sent her to the quarters to get ready to be wed with him.
- Pharaoh was so happy with Abram for bringing his sister on his shopping trip for food, he gave him all kinds of livestock and servants.
- The list included sheep, oxen, male donkeys, male servants, female servants, female donkeys, and camels.
- Then the plagues hit.
- We are not told what kind of plagues or how Pharaoh figured out why they hit so suddenly and hard.
- It could have been painful boils, and when the Pharaoh thought about Sarai, they hurt worse.
- But he got the message and sent for Abram.
- Gen 12:18-9 So Pharaoh called Abram and said, “What is this you have done to me? Why did you not tell me that she was your wife? 19 Why did you say, ‘She is my sister,’ so that I took her for my wife? Now then, here is your wife; take her, and go.”
- Get your stuff and get out of Dodge. Take your wife with you.
- Look what God did.
- He prevented Sarai’s defilement.
- He protected Sarai
- He added to Abram’s wealth.
- He sent Abram and Sarai scurrying back to the promise land.
- Here is what I want you to realize.
- Abram would be considered here like a new Christian.
- Yes, he is going to make mistakes.
- Well, he did, and big ones.
- But God is aware of the mistakes we make as we are learning and growing.
- God is faithful.
- I am so glad God gave us His promise in Psalms 103.
- Psa 103:10-12 He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. 11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; 12 as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.
- Because of that, we can count on God’s faithfulness, even when we are deceived into trusting something else.
- 2Ti 2:13 if we are faithless, he remains faithful– for he cannot deny himself.
- Roger Simms, hitchhiking his way home, would never forget the date–May 7. His heavy suitcase made Roger tired. He was anxious to take off his army uniform once and for all. Flashing the hitchhiking sign to the oncoming car, he lost hope when he saw it was a black, sleek, new Cadillac. To his surprise the car stopped. The passenger door opened. He ran toward the car, tossed his suitcase in the back, and thanked the handsome, well-dressed man as he slid into the front seat. “Going home for keeps?” “Sure am,” Roger responded. “Well, you’re in luck if you’re going to Chicago.” “Not quite that far. Do you live in Chicago?” “I have a business there. My name is Hanover.” After talking about many things, Roger, a Christian, felt a compulsion to witness to this fifty-ish, apparently successful businessman about Christ. But he kept putting it off, till he realized he was just thirty minutes from his home. It was now or never. So, Roger cleared his throat, “Mr. Hanover, I would like to talk to you about something very important.” He then proceeded to explain the way of salvation, ultimately asking Mr. Hanover if he would like to receive Christ as his Savior. To Roger’s astonishment the Cadillac pulled over to the side of the road. Roger thought he was going to be ejected from the car. But the businessman bowed his head and received Christ, then thanked Roger. “This is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me.”
- Five years went by, Roger married, had a two-year-old boy, and a business of his own. Packing his suitcase for a business trip to Chicago, he found the small, white business card Hanover had given him five years before. In Chicago he looked up Hanover Enterprises. A receptionist told him it was impossible to see Mr. Hanover, but he could see Mrs. Hanover. A little confused as to what was going on, he was ushered into a lovely office and found himself facing a keen-eyed woman in her fifties. She extended her hand. “You knew my husband?” Roger told how her husband had given him a ride when hitchhiking home after the war. “Can you tell me when that was?” “It was May 7, five years ago, the day I was discharged from the army.” “Anything special about that day?” Roger hesitated. Should he mention giving his witness? Since he had come so far, he might as well take the plunge. “Mrs. Hanover, I explained the gospel. He pulled over to the side of the road and wept against the steering wheel. He gave his life to Christ that day.” Explosive sobs shook her body. Getting a grip on herself, she sobbed, “I had prayed for my husband’s salvation for years. I believed God would save him.” “And,” said Roger, “Where is your husband, Mrs. Hanover?” “He’s dead,” she wept, struggling with words. “He was in a a car crash after he let you out of the car. He never got home. You see–I thought God had not kept His promise.” Sobbing uncontrollably, she added, “I stopped living for God five years ago because I thought He had not kept His word!” (J.Kirk Johnston, Why Christians Sin, Discovery House, 1992, p.